New Tactics
by Scoobert0
Summary: Dean uses a new torture tactic.  Crack!fic.


**AN: So the idea for this came up while I was talking to Styx88 the other night, how and why, I don't quiet remember. Probably cause we were discussing how we couldn't write the fluff we wanted. Regardless, the topic of 'fluff torture' was presented and this is the result. Pretty sure this falls into the Crack! Category. Enjoy at your own risk! :P**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing, cause not even the Meta episodes are this crazy.**

**Warning: Un-beta'd, any and all mistakes are my own and I apologize in advance.**

"Dean, you can't do this!" Sam pleaded, using his puppy eyes on his big brother.

"Sorry Sam, but I have to. It's the only way to find out where those missing angels are." Dean replied, avoiding his eyes, knowing he'd be doomed to comply with his brother's wishes if he looked at them. The sound of wing beats came from behind them. Turning, the boys saw Castiel standing there, his shoulders slumped.

"Everything is as you requested, Dean." The angel reported, his voice softer than usual. Dean nodded in affirmation and approached the closed door on the opposite side of the room. He grabbed a pair of hearing protection headphones and hung them around his neck.

"Wish me luck." He joked, his trademarked grin in place. Sam scoffed at him while Cas gave him a solemn nod. Entering the room and shutting the door behind him, he saw his victim. In the middle of the room was a demon tied to a chair in the center of an intricate Devil's Trap that Cas had drawn. She glared silently at him as he approached.

"Evening bitch."

"Got to Hell."

"Sorry sweetcheeks, already did that. And by the time I'm done with you, you're going to be wishing you'd never left." Dean said darkly.

"I know all about you being Alistair's little protégé, so do your worst." She spat.

Dean chuckled and looked her in the eye, "Yeah, well you know what? I have access to things here that not even Hell had to offer. And trust me, it's some pretty dark stuff."

He walked to the side of the room and pulled a TV on a cart over so it was directly in front of the demon. He turned it on with the volume up all the way before putting a disc into the DVD player.

"We'll start you off light, see how you react." He told her, as he placed the headphones over his ears. The demon's eyes widened to the size of dinner plates as the video started playing.

"No. No! Anything but this, please! Don't do this! Have mercy, please!" She screamed, unable to look away from the screen. Dean shot her an evil smirk and shook his head no.

* * *

><p>Hours later, Dean exited the room. The sound of incoherent muttering followed him. Taking off the headphones, he walked up to where Sam and Cas were playing Go Fish.<p>

"Well?" The angel asked hopefully.

"Warehouse next to the dock downtown. They're contained in Holy fire without any anti-angel sigils anywhere, so you can move in right away." Dean relayed the information he had gained. Cas nodded his thanks and disappeared. The brothers stood in silence for a few moments before Sam spoke up.

"So it seriously worked?" He asked in disbelief.

"Better than a Holy water dipped knife."

"Huh, who'd have thought Teletubies, Veggie Tales, and The Wiggles could be used for torture."

"Me, obviously. And have you ever watched those shows? They're horrible, even by kid standards. Oh yeah, don't forget about the senseless YouTube videos thrown in for good measure."

"You didn't!"

"I so did. Not to mention the use of horrible business jingles as well."

"Dude, you're like, evil."

Dean quirked his eyebrows and shrugged in response. Silence hung awkwardly between them again.

"Can I help next time?" Sam asked, pleading with his eyes. Dean threw his head back and laughed as he started walking away, "I'm serious!" Sam called after him, jogging to catch up with him.

"Sure. Next time we'll see what you can do Samantha." Dean jibbed. Sam punched him lightly in the shoulder, which Dean rubbed in mock hurt, "Ow. But seriously, it wasn't a bad idea after all now was it. It's efficient, hands free, and with this form of torture I don't have to worry about getting my shoes messy."

"You know what, why don't you just shut up."

"Wow, aren't you just a little bitch."

"Jerk."


End file.
